crash

so there i was... having an ok day. i decided to skip church and be gentle to myself as my honey left for a week-long class in california. i haven't been sleeping well for about 6 years now, so i needed the rest. you can imagine. so, an ok day. then from the other room i hear an awful scraping sound. when i reach the room, my 15-year-old daughter is carving up the coffee table with my butcher knife and sobbing uncontrollably.
wait... back up... she has never done anything this remotely spooky before. being the oldest, she has always been the most happy-go-lucky person i've ever known. well, it turns out that she is really a depressed person and has been for quite some time now. so much so that our new doctor has recently put her on prozac. he outlined all the dangers to teens that prozac has been blamed for, he evaluated her and then we all decided- well mostly she decided- that we should give it a try. i was told to watch her for a few weeks for signs of this type of "dip" in her mood. so much for "dip," this was a ruddy crevasse.
so she was shredding the table top and screaming when i tried to pry her away from it. she gave up the knife readily enough, but wouldn't let go of the table. when she cried out all of her anguish and said many disturbing things such as "it was the table, or me," she and i talked it over. she told me that the medicine was helping her, she said that even with the "crash" she experiences, that she has been happier than she can remember being in a long time. she wants to keep taking it and see what happens.
i just don't know what to do.
my honey and i have been trying to help her with a motivation problem that she seems to have regarding her school work. from the time she was seven years old she just wouldn't do her homework. at that time she wouldn't do her chores either, but she has since improved in that area. a co-worker told mh that her daughter was just diagnosed with oppositional defiance syndrome which is a form of a-d-d. that is how and why the doctor saw her. granted, it's only been two weeks on the medication but...yikes!!!
i have to get her some counseling. maybe i need some counseling, too.
i am so tired.